[Edit: I had planned this to be an update to say that now I have a 3D camera, I can finally take some interesting photos, but it quickly turned into a nonsensical rant, so stop reading now unless you want to hear all about my life's resemblance to something with all the charm and joy of a rancid throbbing dog tumor.]

I now work for a company that takes 3D photos of kids and puts them in crystals, to sell to parents, who will buy any old shit, no matter how tacky.
Since the photos are 3D, I have to carry round a massive 25kg box with the 'camera' in it, and then get each child (or baby, since they're all under 5 years old) to sit still for exactly 1.3 seconds while the picture takes, which can take hours, after which I still have to edit the photos, which takes just as long.

So right, having just edited photos of children so monumentally ugly I genuinely wondered what was stopping them from having the kids put down, for 18 straight hours at my boss' request, I start at a new nursery, during the hour long shoot, my car is towed from outside, so I must carry my massive box to the nearest bus stop.
Later, I went to pick up my car from the arse-end of nowhere, where I had to convince them it was mine by threatening them with the car keys and suggesting they do a semen swab of the car and compare it to my dna, before they finally said I could have it after paying the £260 fine, which I paid, before telling the man I hoped he died in his sleep (not the best curse, but I was tired).

So yes, I'm working 50-70 hours a week, but only being paid for about half of that.

I'm close to snapping and giving the toaster a bath, in which case I'll get someone to photograph it, which at least will mean I'll have a good picture to my name for the first time in ages.

Gah.